Once upon a time… my dad said to me:
“You’re too smart for your own good”
I was young. I didn’t know what it meant but took it as “you're smart”, which is a lot coming from my Chinese emotionless parent.
But the older I grew, I started to see what he meant. Though it was actually for my own good, he meant that it wasn’t for the good of the system. And to be fair, my dad was a cheeky little bastard himself, occasionally fucking with the system whenever he likes. But when his daughter(s) do it, he acts all surprised. How cute.
When I was younger and still in school, I realised the system really wasn’t meant for me. Coming into classes at 7am, having Monday morning ‘briefings’ in the school hall for several hours, leaving at 1pm after hours of continuous classes with only a 20-minute break in the middle of it… It really wasn’t meant for me. I was a night owl. Nothing that happened in the morning served me very well. But when I got home and took a nap, I’d wake up, complete all my homework, read 1–2 books a night till 3–4am, and back I am again at 7am for school. Little did I know, I was doing biphasic sleeping before I even knew what it was.
Then I had a surgery that got me off for about 6 months. I had to go for tuition, catch up on homework, AND still keep my grades up.
And I did.
That’s when I realised the system is fucking stupid. Most of our teachers are practically dumb. One of them would pop in a CD and let the CD teach us whilst she marks papers. Another was teaching English but couldn’t even speak English fluently. My math teacher yelled at me dozens of time because even though I got the answers right, she couldn’t understand how I got there; which was because I learned an advanced way to do it through my tuition teacher, and because I didn’t go the long way around, she refused to give me points.
I got sick of it all. I skipped school every so often, but managed to catch homework I missed out whilst I was gone, and did it at home. It also didn’t help that my parents are Asians, so having tuition didn’t mean you were dumb. It just meant… you were Asian.
That when I realised the school system is fucked up. You had incompetent educators, more focused on setting rules and punishing kids for uncut bangs (fringes), long nails and ankle socks… long hours of studying with horribly short breaks that becomes mindnumbing 5 days a week… and stupidly useless events that we’re forced to participate because — “SCHOOL SPIRIT”.
So though I skipped school on some days, I still did my homework, I still went to tuition, and I still scored well in all my tests. I did it for one year and realised how redundant school was. I made the decision to skip a day of school every week. My mom was pretty nice and she let me stay home. It was better than me jumping the school fence and lying to her. So I’d stay home with her, wash her car, do my homework, read a book, do gardening with her, then head to tuition in the evening/night, and read more books and fell asleep.
With just a ONE DAY difference in my week, I started to have time to be curious about things I learn in school/tuition. I started reading up on Greek myth, philosophy, etc, all at the age for 14. I had time to be a kid AND also be a curious kid when it came to knowledge. The days where I went to school, I’d come home exhausted, napped, attended tuition classes groggy, swallowed dinner, and rinse repeat. But that one day of skipping school made a difference in my life.
Attendance in school mattered though. So what I would do is calculate when I was going to take a day off, when was I going to attend and when was I going to take a halfway and feign being sick. It was well-planned that I end up narrowly graduating. I almost didn’t, but I beat a guy who teachers found out actually didn’t attend school and jumped fences after he got his attendance in. I basically took his place on graduation day.
Let’s jump to university student-me. I hated lectures. All they were going to do was talk about whatever’s on the presentation slides, and those were already online. I loved tutorials though, because I got to debate with my classmates and lecturers. So I skipped out on a lot of lectures. How?
My friend was a master at fake IDs, and fake shit. I got her to fake an MC for me once, and realised how she did it.
So one day, when I was really sick, I took the MC I was given and I scanned it. And now I have an unlimited amount of MCs to fuck around with. Ironically, I was also studying Mass Communication. Learning to use Adobe Photoshop was one of my classes. So I faked MCs. I calculated how many classes could I skip without reason, and how many classes could I skip by using an MC. And of course I can’t use an MC too often. I’m not that much of a sick child. So I had a whole calendar ready.
Side note: My friend and I was to meet at a cafe in campus once, and we were the same distance apart from the cafe (but on different ends). I’m disabled too so I’d be slower than him. Hilariously, because of my disability and laziness, I was looking around for hidden staircases that could lead me to the cafe without having to walk AROUND the building. And I found one. I got there first and he asked me “how the fuck did you do that? I was practically running”. And I told him I found out there’s a staircase that could lead me here from the upper floor. I added that I was lazy, so I try to find shortcuts. We laughed about it, but he stopped and looked at me with a smile. He said “it’s not a bad thing. The laziest people find the most efficient way to do things. And you’re not ‘unhealthy’ lazy. You just find shortcuts because it works better for you. I’ve seen you do assignments. You do them well and you work hard at it, but you also find shortcuts that help you do things better and more efficiently”.
After he said that, I fell in love with him.
Hah. Just kidding. Maybe.
After he said that, I realised that all my life, using shortcuts was something I always naturally preferred to do.
Many who build places do not think about how hard it is for me, a disabled person, to walk AROUND an entire building just to get to the lower floors. Hence, people like me always have to find an innovative way to make our lives less of a hassle, and also less painful.
The world and its system is built on people who need structures, and basic foundations with basic rules to follow even if there are more efficient ways to do things.
- I did mathematical equations faster because I preferred using shortcut formulas to get the answer. The core of it was there, I just preferred a faster way to do it because it’ll give me more time to focus on more long-form questions.
- I had many surgeries in my lifetime, often taking me away from school for 6 months in a year. I had to find a way to still gain knowledge without attending school. I had to feed my own curiosity. I used to buy math workbooks and forced myself to do a page of equations WHILST doing physiotherapy ALL during commercial breaks. And if I can do that in one commercial break, I get to watch the rest of the show. If I didn’t, I had to keep the weights on my leg AND finish the equation and miss my show. I had to find ways to motivate me.
- When walking around, I’m very aware of where all the stairs, escalators, elevators, etc were. So if I had to go somewhere, I could build the entire map in my head and know where to start and finish the errands I had to run WHILST not using so much energy — which also saves me time. It’s why I also have a good sense of direction (unless I’m drunk).
- I skipped lectures in university but read all the things from the presentation slides, and when I attended tutorials, I would question everything. I had more to gain by doing this, and spent the days I didn’t go to class, planning for my assignments or reading up on random shit like Fredrich Nietzsche.
- Also on days off, since high school till today, I’d take up odd freelancing jobs like designing logos or writing. I also did chores for cash. If I’m going to fuck with the system, I better also gain something from it other than ‘peace of mind’.
There are many more instances in my past that lead me to be a cheeky little fucker and fuck with the system.
I don’t believe in forcing your employees to work 9–10 hours a day (Asian culture), sometimes more, when they’re done with their work halfway through their day. I always believe that if you can’t finish your work during your working hours, you’re either being inefficient in how you do your work, or the management is fucking with you and giving you more work than is necessary.
I’ve heard my complaints from friends about how they go to work and finish things, and there’s literally nothing to do at work but wait until their time is done. They can’t Facebook, they can’t touch their phones, etc. Honestly sounds like solitary confinement sometimes. They get stuck in traffic to and fro from work (because it’s peak hours), and then they spend a minimum of 9 hours in the office when they’re done with work by the afternoon. They head home and get stuck in traffic again. They’re exhausted. They don’t even have time for friends or family. They don’t even have time to do their laundry or to clean their room/home. They painstakingly swallow their dinner. Maybe and most likely, they continue working from home. And then they sleep. Rinse repeat.
I have another friend who goes to work, continues working till 10pm in the office, leaves to have dinner, and continue working from home till 4am. He has no time for himself, his friends, his family, his relationships.
They get sick often, have bad relationships with others or feel tired often. They go into depression often because they never have time for themselves.
That used to be me when I was working for an agency for my first job.
I was new and green and didn’t want to fuck with the system. But then after more than a year of abuse, I realised that they treated me badly, would replace me in a heartbeat with no remorse, and I was killing myself for this? And I was also being paid PEANUTS.
I started to come in work late, left on time, sometimes took days off without keying it in (because I know my boss wouldn’t be in and wouldn’t notice). But I NEVER missed a deadline. I NEVER botched a project. I was detailed, timely, and professional in my quality of work. But I couldn’t take the system seriously.
I left not long after for a start-up company with the best mentor/boss I’ve ever had.
If work is done, he’d hilariously tell me to fuck off home. Never once have I ever gone home early even when I had things to do. And though he’d leave early, I’d stay back and work. He trusted me to get my shit done. And I ALWAYS get it done, well and on time.
The other day, I was told to leave and beat the rain and traffic (he’s really caring like that). It was only 3pm. I left a few minutes after he did (out of respect), and when I got home, I managed to clean my room, do my laundry, hang it up, and catch up on a book. Hell, to reward myself, I binged a TV series till I fell asleep. On other days, I do some freelance writing gigs. I’ll fuck with the system but never at the expense of my teachers, lecturers, employers or my self-growth.
The key is not fucking with it because you can and because fuck all.
The key is to fuck with it by being innovative and efficient in your methods. And taking from what my friend said earlier and putting it in my terms; You’re not being lazy. You’re being efficient.
And that’s cool.
So do cheeky shit if it means you gain a better work-life balance. Don’t ever sacrifice your well-being for others. But at the same time, know your worth. If you need to follow the system because it’s how you do best at something, do that. But if you disagree with how the system works because you have a better way of doing things, better for all, then do that instead… even if you have to fake MCs every once in a while. *wink*
Lastly…
Fuck with the system. Don’t fuck the system.
